Features of experiencing the "empty nest" crisis by married and unmarried women

Kapranova Marina PhD in Psychology Associate Professor of the Department of Applied Psychology, State Budgetary Educational Institution of Higher Education of the Moscow region "Technological University" 141070, Russia, Moskovskaya oblast', g. Korolev, ul. Gagarina, 42 kapranova_m@mail.ru

Buchatskaya Marina Viktorovna PhD in Psychology does not work temporarily 141070, Russia, Moskovskaya oblast', g. Korolev, ul. Gagarina, 42 miraclexx@mail.ru

Introduction

The problem of experiencing crisis phenomena in family life has been of active interest for the theory and practice of psychological counseling for many decades. Since the research of V. Satyr and J. Haley examines family life cycles and normative crises in the context of the family system as a function of a living organism, the development of which obeys, on the one hand, its internal laws, and on the other, depends on external influences. 

It is no exception that families experience a rather specific crisis - an "empty nest". The allocation of the "empty nest" crisis is associated with the moment when the youngest or only child leaves the parental home. The experience of this crisis is described through the loss of the meaning of life, the devaluation of the family and the cooling of marital relations.

The theory of the study of the designated crisis, laid down in the works of A.Ya. Varg, E. Duval, S. Minukhin and C. Fishman, J. Haley, A.V. Chernikov and others, allows us to talk about the essence of the experiences of crisis processes ^{[3; 5; 7; 11]}, which can be determined by multiple external variables, which is why the practice of counseling he faces the problem of finding those "reference points" that could help to assess the specifics of experiencing a crisis in each case and develop an approach to its psychological support.

Theoretical overview of the problem

         The study of experiences in psychology presents a well-known methodological problem. The category of "experience" has always been in demand more in the practice of psychology than in the fields of academic science. This can be explained, firstly, by the fact that the phenomenon under study is quite difficult to operationalize and differentiate from many other manifestations of the mental. Secondly, the recognition of the category of experience as a fundamental psychological subject of cognition has led to the emergence of various methodological approaches and requirements for its study, including: understanding psychology, phenomenology, psychoanalysis, existential psychology, activity approach in Soviet psychology, etc.

Justifying his methodological position, F.E. Vasilyuk points out that there is a sense of the category of experience familiar to scientific psychology, which consists in the direct, most often emotional, form of giving the subject the contents of his consciousness. In the author's concept of F.E. Vasilyuk, the experience appears differently: as a special work, with the help of which a person manages to transfer certain (usually difficult) life events and situations, restore lost mental balance, in a word, cope with a critical situation (Vasilyuk F. E., 1984).

Humanistic psychology shifts the emphasis in the study of experiences, thus a category of "positive experiences" appears, one of the manifestations of which is psychological well-being as a single experience expressed in the subjective perception of happiness, satisfaction with one's being and oneself (P.P. Fesenko, T.D. Shevelenkova). Crisis experiences from the perspective of humanistic methodology provide an opportunity for reflection and choice, in the words of A. Maslow, allow us to satisfy the needs for self-actualization.

The humanistic approach to experience in the theory and practice of family psychology allows us to see the actual and potential in the personality as an open system, to recognize new opportunities that have not been realized until now. That is, within the framework of the humanistic paradigm, experiencing the crisis of an empty nest can be regarded as a productive process associated with assessing the family situation, one's attitude to it, and the consequences of this event for later life.

It should be noted that researchers of the family system largely associate the features of the experiences of the "empty nest" crisis with social role stereotypes. Traditional attitudes, manifested in family relationships, orient a woman to emotional and domestic care for children, her parents and husband, creating the image of the "sandwich generation", to use the terminology of R.C. Pierret ^[19]. At the same time, the very ability to constantly take care and be responsible for loved ones is regarded as a kind of achievement, which, however, does not exclude deep conflicts and difficult experiences of a woman. Therefore, the separation of grown-up children is not perceived as a "way out of the sandwich", but, on the contrary, causes a feeling of emptiness, uselessness, meaninglessness of life. An existential conflict requires a woman to rethink her life goals, relationships with others, and lifestyle. The "empty nest" syndrome is particularly intense for a woman centered on motherhood. Conversely, if competing positions turn out to be significant in a woman's value system, for example, "work" or "hobbies", the separation of the child is much easier.

Monitoring the results of psychological research allows us to reasonably assume the dependence of the experience of crisis on a number of social roles and conditions in which they are analyzed ^[7]. At the same time, the current situation requires a significant clarification of the features of experiencing this normative crisis. In particular, the most significant social factors that potentially affect a woman's experience of the "empty nest" crisis today include the following: 

· The professional role of a woman. Explaining this point, we can refer to statistics according to which in Europe the average age of a mother at the birth of a child exceeds 30 years, in Russia - 28.5 years, while the percentage of women giving birth to their first child after 40 years is growing from year to year. Consequently, if earlier it was possible to confidently say that the crisis of the "empty nest" coincides in time with the crisis of the middle life of the individual ^[6], now the trend is becoming more and more vivid that the studied family crisis may occur at the pre-retirement and retirement age of the mother. That is, the forecast of additional layering of crisis structures is likely: an "empty nest", on the one hand, and a professional regulatory crisis, on the other, in connection with which the assumption about the presence of features of its experience seems reasonable.

·          The relationship of dependence, psychological and material, in which adult children fall. As L.B. Schneider points out, the specificity of parents' relations to their adult children in Russian families is expressed in a high degree of control, which deprives grown-up children of independence, even if they try to build their own families ^[13].

· The specifics of the distribution of family roles and the assessment of family boundaries in the context of the functioning of complex and incomplete families. The fact that a separate nuclear family, familiar to Western psychology, is quite rare in Russian reality, is already a traditional fact for family counseling in our country. However, modern social trends, demonstrating a significant devaluation of the institution of marriage, lead to another fact: that a large proportion of women meet outside of marriage during the separation of grown-up children. The special social role of an unmarried woman raising children causes her to have specific attitudes and experiences.

Thus, the identified factors determine the need for a purposeful analysis of the experience of the crisis of the "empty nest" of the modern family in the conditions relevant to it.

Organization of empirical research

Studies of the "empty nest" crisis demonstrate that psychological problems during this period are typical for women, accompanied by value-based personal conflicts and internal experiences. However, it can be assumed that there are certain features of experiencing and overcoming this crisis period, depending on the roles taken by the woman that accompany it. It seems reasonable to believe that unmarried women, when experiencing the crisis of the "empty nest", are characterized by a state of emptiness, depression, low mood ^[6]. The destructive psycho-emotional state of single mothers during this period is usually explained by the complexity of their self-realization and the inability to find a replacement for the lost family role.

         In accordance with the logic of the study, an empirical sample was formed, consisting of 60 women, aged 45 to 60 years, whose children began to live separately from three months to a year.  All women had higher education and worked. The total sample was divided according to the marital status of women:

· group 1 consisted of 30 married women,

· Group 2 consisted of 30 women who have not been married for the last 10 years.

Factors determining the reasons for the marital status or characterizing the structure of the family, as well as factors related to the personal and professional characteristics of a woman were external to this study.

The traditions of the humanistic approach in the study prescribe fixation on the subjective world of a person, which allows to know the specifics of his perception of happiness, satisfaction, assessment of the actual life situation and attitude to it. In view of this, the following criteria have been studied as the main parameters for assessing the experience of an empty nest crisis:

- subjective attitude to the semantic constructs "My child" and "I";

- the structure of psychological well-being as a set of internal factors affecting the experience of happiness, satisfaction with one's being and oneself;

- assessment of the significance of the constructs "Child", "Family", "Work", "Hobbies" in connection with the elements of the structure of psychological well-being of the individual.

An empirical study of the selected criteria was carried out using the following methods ^{[2; 12; 16]}:

1. To assess the attitude to the constructs: "My child", "I", the method "Semantic differential" (Ch. Osgood). When processing the results of the methodology, a 3-scale variant was used (Scales "Assessment", "Strength", "Activity").

2. The study of the structure of psychological well-being is organized using the methodology of the "Scale of psychological well-being" (K. Riff). The logic of processing and interpreting the results of the methodology is based on the procedure of in-depth study of factors proposed by P.P. Fesenko, who pointed out that the analysis of the correspondence of the integral indicator of psychological well-being and each component indicates the degree of the individual's desire to realize the positive aspects of his own functioning.

3. The study of the nature of the connection of the significance of the constructs "Child", "Family", "Work", "Hobbies" with the elements of the structure of psychological well-being of the individual is based on the results of a modified version of the MOBiS methodology (M.V. Buchatskaya). The technique is a form of graphical assessment that allows you to assess the significance of the stimuli presented to the subject. According to the instructions to the methodology, each respondent woman had to imagine that the paper is her life at the present time, the yellow circle is herself, the red one is family, the blue one is work at the present time. The diagnostic indicator of the technique is the distance in centimeters from the center of the circle "I" to the center of each placed circle, which is considered as an indicator of significance (value): the greater the distance, the less significance.

The calculation of mathematical statistics for the obtained data was carried out using the SPSS program and included methods of descriptive statistics, calculation of the correlation coefficient H. Spearman and the method of comparative analysis of the Mann-Whitney U-test (for nonparametric measurements).

Results and their discussion

Results of the method "Semantic differential" Ch. Osguda, aimed at studying the attitude of married and unmarried women during the crisis of the "empty nest" to the constructs "My child" and "I", indicate that all women surveyed evaluate their children equally positively (Table 1).

Table 1

Results of the "Semantic differential" methodology

for the "My child" construct

The data given in the table indicate that unmarried women show a greater tendency to highly evaluate the parameters "strength" and "activity" for their child than married women. It is also interesting that in assessing themselves, unmarried women similarly show a tendency to a higher score according to all the analyzed criteria.  The most significant difference is on the "strength" scale, which allows us to conclude that women in this sample are more likely to evaluate themselves as independent, confident, and inclined to rely on themselves.

The analysis of the structure of psychological well-being according to the method of K. Riff, carried out in accordance with the procedure and interpretations of the author of the method ^[16,18,12], demonstrates the following (Table 2):

Table 2

The results of the methodology of the "Scale of psychological well-being" K. Riff (C.D. Ryff)

1. The indicators of the scales give reason to believe that both married and unmarried women during the crisis of the "empty nest" equally prefer having close, pleasant, trusting relationships with others, show a desire to take care of other people, are capable of empathy, love and intimacy. They are characterized by the presence of goals in life and a sense of meaningfulness of life, the feeling that the present and the past are meaningful. In assessing the ability to manage the environment, a sense of confidence and competence in the organization of everyday affairs is expressed. Checking the significance of differences between the values of the general well-being index in the two studied groups according to the Mann-Whitney criterion proves the absence of statistically significant differences (U=322.5, at p<0.01).

2. There are differences in the closeness of connections within the structure of psychological well-being of the compared groups, which were analyzed on the basis of correlation analysis between the scales of methods and the general index of well-being. Statistical results show that in both groups of women, all the studied components, such as "Personal growth", "Goals in life", "Autonomy", "Environmental management", "Self-acceptance" and "Positive relationships with others", show significant links with the integral indicator of psychological well-being (Table 3).

Table 3

Correlation analysis of the results of the "Psychological well-being Scale" methodology in a group of married women

and unmarried women (p<0.01)

In the group of married women, the closest links were obtained between the general well-being index and the indicators of the scales "Personal growth" (r=0.94) and "Goals in life" (r=0.93). The obtained result partly confirms the data cited by O.A. Tikhomandritskaya, which indicates the connection of the psychological well-being of married women with the successful mastery of various types of activities, the ability to achieve what they want, overcome difficulties in realizing their own goals, with a sense of life meaning, the value of their own existence, with the desire to develop, learn and perceive new things ^[10].

Unmarried women have the strongest links between the overall well-being index and the scale of the "Goals in Life" methodology (r=0.94), and the "Personal growth" scale, the most indicative in the case of statistical analysis of data on a group of married women, in this case shows a significant, but less close correlation result (r=0.52). More significant for the overall psychological well-being of an unmarried mother is the presence of positive relationships with others (r=0.75).

The differences in the indicators of the relationship of the component "Autonomy" are also interesting: in the group of unmarried women, the corresponding scale shows a significant, but less close relationship with the general index of well-being (r=0.48), while in the group of married women "Autonomy" occupies a high place in the correlation hierarchy (r=0.69). Thus, the opinion is substantiated that the extent to which a woman, being married, feels independent and independent, significantly determines her positive experiences. However, for single mothers, a high or low assessment of their own independence may have a much weaker effect on her psychological well-being. At the same time, unmarried women are more characterized by the desire to realize their potential, to track their own personal growth and a sense of self-improvement over time.

To study the nature of the relationship of the elements of the structure of psychological well-being with the degree of significance of the constructs "Child", "Family", "Work", "Hobbies", the results of the "MOBiS" methodology (M.V. Buchatskaya) were used.

. The result of the "MOBiS" methodology

The results of the initial processing of the methodology shown in Figure 1 allow us to see that both married and unmarried women demonstrate a general tendency to a higher assessment of the importance of their child and family than the spheres of "work" and "hobbies". At the same time, the differences between the samples are not statistically proven, even on the "work" scale, where the difference in measures of central trends between the groups is most pronounced. This allows us to speak more about universality in assessing the significance of constructs, rather than about their differentiated properties.

At the same time, the results of statistical analysis of the relationship between the elements of the structure of psychological well-being and the degree of significance of constructs (Table 4) reveal significant differences.

 In married women, the "Child" scale significantly (p<0.01) correlates with the "Goals in Life" scale (r=0.53) and the general index of psychological well-being (r=0.52).

Unmarried women have no significant correlation coefficients of the "Child" scale and the scales of psychological well-being. At the same time, the overall index of psychological well-being of unmarried women, as well as the scales "positive relationships with others" and "environmental management" during this period significantly depend on work (r=0.6).

These data indicate that the high importance of their child for a married woman during the crisis of the "empty nest" may be accompanied by a lack of life goals and a low level of psychological well-being.

Table 4

Results of correlation analysis between different scales of psychological well-being and attitudes to significant areas of functioning of married and unmarried women (p<0.01)

The empirical results obtained allow us to assert that the experience of the "empty nest" crisis really has specifics for married and unmarried women. However, psychodiagnostic data partially refute the judgment that this specificity lies in the state of emptiness and maladaptation characteristic of unmarried women. This condition may indeed be, but the well-being of a single mother during this period is more related to her awareness of life goals and job satisfaction and is much less centered on her child. It is important for psychological work that for an unmarried woman there is a tendency to perceive her child as strong and active. The search for psychological support resources in this case should be sought by working out a woman's professional attitudes, their integration with life goals.

The peculiarity of experiencing the crisis of the "empty nest" of married women is that their psychological well-being during this period is significantly related to the child.  The results, which are also confirmed by studies carried out, for example, Voronova A.A., Alekseenko T.V. and Sudakova Yu.V., allow us to talk about the presence of a high centering of married women on their child, which, in case of a break in communication with him during the crisis of the "empty nest", leads them to the loss of goals in life and a decrease in psychological well-being. The solution to this problem is possible due to a complex restructuring of the value system, the adoption of new life meanings. In this case, psychological support is also required for a married couple, since this is the period when it is necessary to re-learn to be a dyad, to be just partners, and not just parents who were united by their child.

Conclusions

Experiencing the crisis of the "empty nest" as an intrapersonal existential problem of a woman requires careful psychological support. The study of the specifics of experiences, their connection with the actual factors of the "living space" expands the understanding of the options for psychological assistance technologies.

Empirical research has shown that crisis experiences are specific for married and unmarried women. Moreover, married women experience a greater degree of dependence on the relationship with their child and the loss of intimacy with them. Unmarried mothers have a tendency to link psychological well-being with their work, therefore, orientation to professional activity can act as a compensating factor of experiences in this case.

Thus, the psychological support of women experiencing the crisis of the "empty nest" cannot be unified and requires a differentiated approach, in particular, regarding the family role performed by a woman.  At the same time, it must be remembered that a crisis is not always a bad thing. The crisis can also give a new turn in life, therefore, the fundamental goal of psychological support for the crisis of the "empty nest" is to promote positive personal changes of a mother woman, to help open up new horizons for her in a difficult situation of restructuring the family system.

The study made it possible to consider only one of the possible factors significant for the psychological support of women during the crisis of the "empty nest".  At the same time, it allows us to predict the prospects of continuing research work in terms of studying the influence of a number of socio-psychological, professional-psychological, personal factors on the specifics of women's experiences.